I’m 26 years old. I am curious beyond convention. I want to know how I got here, where I came from and where I’m going.
want to make a contribution to this universe in the most significant
possible way, except I haven’t figured exactly how to do that yet... To
try to get closer.. I meditate on white light at least an hour each
day. It takes me someplace higher, free from the secrets I’ve been
living alongside my whole life.
When I say alongside, I mean,
the secrets are not mine... Simply put, I was raised blind to the
history, lineage, or any background of my family.. Most of it was
hidden from me in one way or another for most of my life..
said earlier, I was born naturally curious, so consequently, I was
frequently denied the truths I seeked not only about my family’s past
which they were suspiciously secretive about, but about my family’s
present, particularly the disapperance of my sister Soraya...
left when I was 10 years old, so my recollections of her were quite
idealic, but i still remember her being quite conflicted in her teen
years, especially right before she left.. I remember her to be quite
eccentric, living in her own world. She would often run around in my
mothers gowns and jewels. She had a sadness to her though... Something
I remember, but not specifically why.
My family is always one
minute away from virtual collapse, and it seems like that too is
becoming too much of a burden to bear because I don’t know why they are
under such strife...
So, I have begun a quest to find my sister
and bring her back. I think the family will stabilize significantly if
she returns to us and many questions will be answered. I need that. I
need to have some answers.
Did I forget to mention that the one
thing I do know, is that my family was at one time royalty, and in
another time and place I was considered, Prince Anzar.
I asked for a sign recently. On my knees, in tears. Something to keep me on my road…
And I asked the light to come.. The tears stopped and I breathed for a moment.. Tried to listen to the beats of my heart.. But they were silent... Just silence... I stopped for a moment.. Having so much to do, but not knowing how to do it or what it is, is fantastically exhausting... But at that moment.. I felt it… I do know what to do...
My eyes light up… Please… Bring me bravery… "It is already yours…" It is I, with whom I speak.. My higher self... My guide… It feels so close... Been talking to it since I was a child...
There is definitely something in the room tonight, over my shoulder, reading this as I write… At the very least, a spectacular imagination.. At most... Divination…
"We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark; the real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light. – Plato"